Even before Xander was born, I started doing the math. It is, I suppose, a byproduct of having a child at 40.
When he was a newborn, I thought how I’d be 80 when he was the age I was then.
Every birthday is a mile marker for us both.
Today Xander is four.
He told me the other day he wants to stay little. I want him to stay little too, small enough so that I can still hold him when he wraps his arms around my neck and his legs around my waist and clings to me. Small enough so that I’m not aging, too, counting down one less year I’ll have to spend with him.
But this post is supposed to be about Xander. Not me.
So let’s discuss Year of Three. We potty trained (yippee!), including a memorable pee in the portable potty – on the bleachers during Sawyer’s baseball practice. Team was confused when all the moms sitting there started cheering.
Xander started preschool. I was excited to have two days of 2 1/2 hours of freedom per week. Xander was less excited to be away from home. I’d like to say his crying tantrums before we leave most mornings (still!) are because he misses me too much, but I really think he misses my iPad.
The boy is an introvert. I KNOW! I don’t know how this is possible. He is extremely shy around adults, even ones he’s met before, clinging to my leg and hiding his face. At school this past week the teacher mentioned that he was the most interactive he’s ever been. Apparently his warm-up period is, oh, about six months. He has made one friend at school and fortunately they’ll be in the same pre-k class next year.
Third child syndrome is alive and well. Sage started reading when she wasn’t much older than Xander, while he can’t recognize letters. Apparently I actually have to work with him or something. I figured he’d learn it through Older Sibling Osmosis (OSO), just like he’s learned the words “fart” and “stupid idiot” and, of course, how to play minecraft. (See fail, parent).
Xander gets to play soccer in the fall. He’s excited, he said, because he gets to “kick people in the face.”
Remember when your first born started kindergarten and came home with all kinds of fun words and phrases? And you sniffed and said it’s because his friend little Johnny has older siblings and learns all that bad stuff that is now polluting your precious child? Yeah. Xander is totally little Johnny. I apologize in advance, future kindergarten classmates of his.
He’s funny, though. He really is. I wish I could come up with some good examples but they’re location jokes: you have to be there. Let’s just say it’s tough to find a picture in which he’s not winking or doing this scrunchy face.
The truth is, I cannot predict how he’s going to be in a few years, like I could with Sawyer and Sage. And I’m okay with that. He’s been an unbelievably amazing surprise since I took that pregnancy test almost five years ago.
I can’t wait to see what happens next.
Happy birthday, sweet boy. Nobody loves you like Mommy.